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8 Ways to Influence People

8 Ways to Influence People

Jonathan Farrington

June 23, 2009

4. The Emotional Approach

You use your natural charm, charisma or enthusiasm.

This approach works when your influence becomes a genuine extension of your own feelings and beliefs. Appealing to the long-term effects of your ideas, you will reinforce their continuing value.

Do remember though that emotional appeal carries risks. It can leave a nasty taste in the mouth. Painful memories linger longer.

5. The Assertive Approach

You ask directly, clearly and confidently for what you want, or don’t want.

Assertiveness can have a lasting effect, especially on those who least expect it from you. Any resistance is met by your persistence.

Assertive influence carries little or no risk.

6. The Passive Approach

You win the day by being submissive, by not overtly influencing.

As you quietly demonstrate desired behaviors, others can see for themselves the value in following your lead. Many potential confrontations with power or authority demand submissive influence, which can pay positive dividends.

The downside is that your submissiveness may leave you with feelings of low-esteem. Can you live with this?

7. The Sales Approach

You use good old-fashioned salesmanship.

Draw out their point of view, understand their needs, demonstrate that you empathize; minimize resistance by showing how their ideas dovetail with your own; show how they will benefit.

Do realize though that logical or submissive people often hate an overt sales approach and may work hard to wreck your plans.

8. The Bargaining Approach

You trade concessions in order to reach a mutually acceptable conclusion.

Don’t just share the cake – make it a bigger one. Your success as a fair negotiator will help cement the relationship.

Aim too low and you’ll end up even lower. Over collaborate and you may regret giving too much away.

Always trade concessions.